Miss Jolly • A matronly Cookery teacher, obsessed with romance but sadly without a man.

Miss Davies • A friendly, hard working, slightly weary form teacher, loved by her form.

Headmistress • No-nonsense, jolly hockey sticks, an old school Headmistress.

Mr Grey •  The Careers Officer, pompous, condescending, loves filling in forms.

Geoffrey Drain • School caretaker, multi-instrumentalist, hates kids!

Mr Powell • P.E teacher, wears over tight tracksuit, a ladies man. (or so he likes to think).

Debbie James • Our heroine, a bright girl, stands up for her rights, perhaps a bit square.

Tom Green • Our hero, a cheeky working class lad, everyone’s friend, always helping others.

Harry Machin • Tom’s best mate, very sporty.

Susan Pye • Debbie’s mate, a tart with a heart.

Dick Littleworth • Tom’s mate, has a very over protective mother.

Laura Smith • Loves animals.

John Green • Tom’s elder brother, headstrong.

Malcolm Simmons • A bully.

Steph Barber • Wants to be a hairdresser.

Bob Watson • Always eating, never speaks.

Mrs James • Debbie’s long suffering mum.

Mr James • Debbie’s Dad, small minded, pompous and overbearing.

Priest • Officiates at Miss Davies’ funeral

Gym Instructor • Extremely flexible, energetic female gym instructor.

The Other Woman • Mike’s bit on the side.

Waiter • serves in the Café.

Ensemble • 6 to as many as available,
or stage can accommodate.